Friday, December 29, 2006

Hmm... Ranting

Ive been behind a bit with the posts lately. Part of it is the fact that its between congresses so nothing major is going on to talk shit about. There's also lingering burnout from getting so wrapped up in this stuff during the campaign, then there's the fact that I don't have web access at my house at the moment. So its the old one two combo of no time and not giving a shit. But its the end of the year so a few strolls down memory lane might cheer me up. Or maybe just a rant against shit that pisses me off.

Lets see the economy is showing actual signs of recovery, that's good, like real incomes have improved in my town for the first time in a while. I love this little town but its dying a slow agonizing death, similar to every small town USA, the stores that actual give a town character are forced out to make way for a wal-mart, 10 miles from town there's a overbearing cathedral to the gods of consumerism, The Mall, but that wasn't too big a deal now our shit mall is surrounded by lame ass stores like target best buy walmart- which will soon be vacant, but no its not going out of business, half a mile away they're building a super fucking walmart, chain restaurants dot the place, and being a fat guy who loves food... as opposed to fat guy who doesn't like food? any way I hate chain restaurants. Go to a ApplebeesTGIFridaysChillisOliveGardenOutbackRubyTuesdays and you'll get a perfectly decent meal for 12 bucks, or you can spend about the same and get a fucking good meal at any number of local restaurants. I often use this example because its so obvious to me. Id rather go to chapel lumber than to home depot, ill go to corning and wander market street before ill go to the dreaded mall, Oh and music stores. like many things this is tough for the small town shop to compete in, but there's a couple around and I try to go there. One just opened and I thought hey I could get the new NOFX album there, but no. I looked for something for my cousin and when they didn't have what I was looking for I ended up at the dreaded chain store. I found the CD only to find out after he threw it in his car that it was edited. If your going to sell a fucking manipulated cause your worried about people with sand in their vagina's who want to listen to Method Man 4:21 the day after then you damn well better let me know its fucking edited. I mean seriously whats the demographic that buys a rap album which gets it title from pot-head folk lore but doesn't want to hear any curse words? If your trying to protect the children then improve school funding, give them the tools and skills to raise themselves out of poverty, half removing four letter words doesn't protect shit. By the way Fuck You Tipper Gore, still the only Thing I have against Al. So now I gotta get him the receipt and take the album back, and get the real one. Again if you want to buy an album about smoking pot and gettin' wasted but are scared of the word Fuck then fine buy an edited version, I have no problem with edited versions, the point is that Edited should not be standard, the real version should be standard and edited should get the fucking label. You can put the little tipper stickers on the unedited ones I don't care but put it on the outside of the fucking plastic, I'm an adult and I like the pretty pictures on the cover, I bought is I own it I don't want your stupid fucking label on there I should have the right to take that sticker off. Shit they did this with movies, now half the videos you find in the store are the "unrated" versions, or directors cut, which usually only means there's and extra couple minutes there's rarely anything great that gets added back in, but my point is simply the hypocrisy of a store that will stand there with a stupid grin and sell me the unrated Clerks 2 which has a donkey sex scene in the normal version, (good flick though) and then sells me and album with three outta four letters removed from half the words, i mean really what's the difference between f___ and fuck? The kids can still sing every word of the song, they sing right over the bleeps.

So in a nutshell Fuck chain restaurants that heat-up frozen food and charge the same as a place with an actual chef, Fuck anyone who wants to censor music that I purchase, Fuck the big box stores for placing themselves outside of the city limits so they can put as little money as possible back in to the community they suck the life out of, Fuck Target for pretending to be classy when its just a fucking walmart, fuck walmart for being the crack whore version of kmart that ran around humping the shit out of every small town in america till it left its sociopath bastard seeds to slowly and painfully kill off everything that used to constitute the american dream. fuck consumerism, you are not your clothing, you are who you are no matter if your in versace or salvo special. Remember a monkey in a business suit is still a monkey. I hate that no one cares. I hate that people think I'm on some fucking crusade because I very simply state that I don't shop at walmart or target or lowes or home depot, They tell me its not going to change anything whether you shop there or not, and I always say your right, but I'm not going to support them either. And if I can influence just a couple of people to stop shopping at places that destroy communities then maybe they influence a few more, and we can put a minor dent into their profits. which still wont do shit but hey its something. My in a nutshell turned out to be a coconut shell. so lets try again. Fuck consumerism. Peace.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You should honestly change your name from Kilgore Trout Jr. You are in no way a successor to Kilgore Trout or even come close to the literary genius of his books or alias personalities on the internet. Kilgore Trout is often a pen name by people with talent. Don't ruin it for the rest of us by rants on "consumerism." You give all those Kilgore Trouts bad names. Especially Lawerence Pelo (chaotic not random).

Kilgore Trout said...

Thats the point. The character Kilgore Trout from numerous Kurt Vonnegut Jr. books was always a bad writer, his books were the filler in the windows of porn stores, thats the entire reason why I use the name, I know I'm a shitty writer. So you trying to insult me with this well, thats like making fun of a fat kid thats wearing a wide load shirt.

So great job captain obvious, as for any other Kilgore Trouts, well they obviously weren't original either so they can suck my left nut. If Kurt Vonnegut Jr. wants to drop me a line saying I'm not worthy then fine, I'd change my name, then Id see if he wanted to go get a beer or somethin'. Not every day you get to talk to a living legend.

Anonymous said...

That was probably the most funny comeback I have ever read. Bravo. You get 'em boy!

Well, besides the idiot that has to give his two bit cents. I liked it; it was hilarious. I agree with every damn word you said. I just wish I could put that amount of sarcasm in my writing. You definitely have the nack.