So I gotta write a freaking wedding ceremony, and being a procrastinator my time is getting short. My other problem is that as I've alluded to before I've been a bit down lately, mostly due to my usual problem of complete and utter ineptitude with the ladies, what does that have to do with anything? Well when you're feeling depressed because because you're perpetually single, to the point where I'll go to bars with friends girlfriends and no one cares, we make jokes about how I'm practically the gay friend because I sure as fuck not stealing anyones girl. Admittedly part of that is also the fact that they guys trust there girls and I wouldn't do that shit, but if I tried it wouldn't be any more effective. Anyway all that makes it a little tough to come up with eloquent prose about the joys of love and life together.
The basics of the ceremony I can steal, er come up with easily enough. I'm not religious, neither is the groom but the bride has some spirituality and I need to find out if she wants any god stuff thrown in there. I'd rather not, but hey it's not my wedding.
I've always been a fan of quotes, most of the thoughts in my head have probably entered someone else's too, and theres a good chance that at least once the thought was expressed by someone more eloquent than I. Plus I'm pretty good at remembering them.
Hmm... This one is good especially if you cut off the first part.
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.
- Mark Twain
Now some more, just to save.
For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
- Rainier Maria Rilke
He who is in love is wise and is becoming wiser, sees newly every time he looks at the object beloved, drawing from it with his eyes and his mind those virtues which it possesses.
Love isn't a decision. It's a feeling. If we could decide who we loved, it would be much simpler, but much less magical.
- South Park (ok I need to point out the absurdity that one of the best quotes I've found is from south park)
If anyone else has some suggestions I'm all ears. Obviously I'm going to include some anecdotes about the bride and groom, and their two amazing little kids.
[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weapon—laughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecution—these can lift at a colossal humbug—push it a little—weaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
What can I say I like Twain (Clemens) and the groom is a funny dude, so it fits more than it might seem at first.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates (who knew that Socrates had a bit of a Rodney Dangerfield side to him)
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
- R.D. Laing
Ok I don't plan on using that one, but it is funny.